I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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