I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
