i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
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