just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
