It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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