the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize