I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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