A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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