i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
