i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
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