i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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