She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
