How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
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