Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
He felt like a one man threesome
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize