thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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