she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
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