I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
