so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
