let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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