The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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