Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
