i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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