yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Randomize
