I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Randomize
