I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
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