I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
