shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
