I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
