pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
