dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize