whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
