Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
