We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize