yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
he thought i was a dude.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
