I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
