Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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