Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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