I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
