Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
