drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
