she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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