I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
