You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
