Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
two words...techno handjob
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Also, beer. Big fan.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
