You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
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