just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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