I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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