on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
