My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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