I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
